Men are wolves, be careful
When you get to that age, take care
They may wear sheeps’ faces, but in their hearts
A wolf is growling, it’s true

If you let your guard down
And believe that he’s different
You’re in for trouble, trouble, ah, trouble, trouble

SOS SOS
Hear me, hear me calling
Today, once again, a girl is in trouble

It’s easy to be careless and get swept away by the night
But think
Once you close your eyes, you’ve lost
If you try too hard, it’s all over, it’s true

If you dismiss what I’m saying
As something some person from the olden days would say
You’re in for trouble, trouble, ah, trouble, trouble

SOS SOS
Hear me, hear me calling
Today, once again, a girl is in trouble

I was really lucky enough to go see Thom Yorke last week. It's been my highlight so far.

It's week 3 at school but it feels like it's been more than that. I dropped Badminton, so I'm only taking Advanced Painting, Multimedia Painting and Classical Art History. At first Advanced Painting seemed daunting because my teacher had a very strict syllabus, but she's loosened up quite a bit, especially since she admitted she was only being strict because she thought the original teacher (who is on sebatical) was strict, but we explained how he was the exact opposite. Now she's trying to be everyone's friend... she dropped her guard too fast.

I am now the Art/Graphic Design Club President. I'm honored and everything but, to be honest, anyone could've been president if they were actually passionate about Art and were organized. Unfortunately since there is such a pathetically severe lack of enthusiasm from the art students at my school, I took upon the daunting responsibility. I want to make a change, even if it's futile.

Turns out I only have 12 units left after this quarter. If that wasn't good news enough, those last classes I have to take are completely up to me, they are my electives. I'm hoping to take more challenging art classes. So technically I can graduate next quarter, but I'm sticking around for the end of Spring Quarter to participate in my Senior Show. Plus I'm enjoying living away from home... even though I have to pay for it.

I have no idea why but I've been watching Glee. I never thought I'd watch it but I just loooove Sue and Kurt. I need to finish watching Seinfeld and maybe start Dexter.

I really want to talk about my personal life though, so I'll make another post after this.

My original spring break plans were to go to Seattle, Portland and San Francisco, but half a week ahead of time, the whole thing got canceled because apparently I was the only one interested. Instead I had to come up an alternative adventure, and ultimately decided I'd go visit my friend in Oceanside. A few things led up to that though. Sunday BoA was having a signing in Pasadena, which is basically my backyard, how could I pass that up. I waited in line for 2 hours with Yoko and even though the line wrapped around the building, and I thought we had a good spot, she only signed for about a fraction of it. It was alright though, I kinda felt bad for her anyway. Early in the week I helped my mom set up her classroom (which I hate to do) and then Thursday was a shocker, I took driving lessons. Illegally too haha, because I didn't have a permit. It was a 2 hour lesson, driving around my neighborhood, and was surprisingly not as bad as I was expecting. I can't imagine getting on the freeway though, oh god. Then Friday I took the train to Oceanside and spent my whole weekend there, having a great time. I hadn't been to the beach in awhile and it was nice to get away from the usual sights.

April 29th, Rufus Wainwright is coming nearby to Anaheim so I'm excited to see him again (albeit a solo show). And of course VAMPS will be going all over the place this summer. I think I'll only go to the LA Wiltern show. It's funny to me that 3 years ago I was flipping out that Hyde was even coming to the west coast and I made my best effort to go to all 4 shows, but this year I'm like "oh hey, he's coming to LA, I guess I should go". Kinda sad, but hey, I'm not gonna lie, VAMPS is my L'Arc/Hyde boner killer and it isn't until L'Arc comes back will I flip out like I did 3 years ago. I could really go for a REAL era flashback.

Happy Singles Awareness everyone!
I submitted that drawing in a "Anti-Valentines Day" show tonight, haha. Cliche I guess.

Striped Carnation = "No, Sorry, I cannot be with you"
Orange Mock = "Deceit"

I'm obsessed with the view from my window.

( other time views )

Compared to last year, I made my ceramic roses more complex and larger. I actually didn't think I was doing anything different til I moved home last night and saw the tiny ones I made last year. I donated the last two roses on the right to an Autism and Asperger's Benefit Show in downtown pomona last night. I didn't go, but I got word that the red rose sold, so I'm really happy about that. Something I created was on display and purchased by a stranger. This is the beginning.

I'm at a point in my life where I'm in the middle of transition. My taste and interests are shifting and I'm slowly shaking off my old worn-out self. I still don't know what I'm doing and I'm still making stupid mistakes but that's the point. I'm scared about my future but I also feel oddly in control (determined). I feel a severe lack of support from my parents but I don't need it. I want to work hard and prove them wrong, all by myself, and FOR myself. The art world, it's like walking into a dark tunnel. I also want to move away. I'm thinking of Portland in the future, after I go to grad school. And for that I'm thinking Art Center in Pasadena but if possible, elsewhere would be nice. I need to get off my lazy ass and create a kick ass portfolio to get a scholarship or something. I NEED TO GROW UP. I'm also in an odd position with my friends. After my revolutionary boy drama where friendships seem to have ruptured I wonder if I'm as vital as I think I am or if I'm capable of going it alone. I've been so disillusioned.

I also want to point out how much I love my new layout. Thanks Mel for the background ♥

omg I didn't know she had an egg with her too! how cute. I didn't think I'd ever get into her music, but I have. Songs that I thought were ridiculous and beyond comprehension in the past are now very emotional and beautiful to me. You guys probably think I'm insane now.

Yesterday was technically my first gallery showing, in downtown pomona. One of my painting classmates plans on becoming a gallery owner as a career, and managed to get hold of an empty space downtown. He invited all painting students past and present to show some of their work. I didn't have any new work to show, so I assembled some old work and thew it in. For some reason I was embarrassed by my work though, since everyone else had abstract type of work, and I suddenly felt unoriginal and cliche (ironic?). But when I got there and people complimented me, I was relieved. I have low self-esteem as an artist sometimes (not fishing for compliments btw).

That movie I made with my friends won best comedy in the campus movie festival, so it moves up to compete in San Francisco this upcoming weekend. I'm going with the whole cast, so that'll be fun to escape pomona (maybe). Hopefully I can visit Fawn.